I'm not much for the old sayings of the world but there was one that came to mind for me, often last week; the only way around it, is through it... we had to decide to press through.
As some of you may know, this has been our life to the nth degree, especially over the last 15 months since Lily was born.
Lily goes to the doctor for many appointments and often she is weighed; measured for length and her head circumference is tracked. Over the course of the last 9 months, it had been determined that Lily's head was growing a bit too fast. It was brought to our attention last September but nothing was done about it because there were no other alarming symptoms. Last week an MRI was ordered, so bright and early in the morning we headed off. Of course Lily arrived on an empty tummy- which I don't think she was too pleased about.
Daddy and I waited out in the waiting room, as patiently as possible- while our daughter had to be put to sleep for the imaging. We were alerted when she was out and in the recovery room. We were encouraged to just let her finish her "nap" so that she wouldn't wake up crabby but that wouldn't be much different from any other day, Ha!
As I looked upon my sleep induced daughter (which they had to put oxygen on her, because she was deep asleep) she looked so angelic and it's puzzling how anything could ever be wrong with her, how anything could ever be out of place in her little body.
There were many things we were facing this day, we knew both of her ventricles in her brain were swollen but we didn't know to what degree or what the cause was. There were threats of needing to put in a VP shunt, a permanent tube- more or less to keep the over flow from her brain moving out of her body. There was a laundry list of risks involved either way; death, seizures, excessive crankiness, more swelling, infections- the list goes on.
We finally got our hands on the doctor on staff, he explained everything pretty clearly. Lily has swelling in both ventricles, the cause is unknown and there are no visible blockages either but needing a shunt was in order. This was all confirmed a few days later at her doctor's office. I cried... Of course I cried. When is this ever going to end? The laundry list of health problems, Lord knows this isn't the first one but BRAIN SURGERY!? C'mon man! That's all I could think...
My husband and I are mostly pretty private people, really we are but we knew that we had to reach out and share with others what was going on because this is kind of a big deal. So we made phone calls, sent text messages and shared what was on our heart and what we were facing as a family. Last but not least we took our big problem to our big God. -Knowing nothing is too big for Him...
We prayed, we discussed, we lifted up and bared our souls once more. What else are we to do?
We followed up with Neuroscience today at the major hospital in our area. We went in fully expecting to set up an appointment for surgery as soon as possible. Boy we were ever socked sideways with what came next. After the week that we had- then to hear that; "she doesn't need surgery" just about blew me away. I think my response was repeating his answer a couple of times, then welling up with tears because he confirmed once more that given her circumstances and her genetic anomalies, the way her brain looks and the way it has developed was to be expected and for her it just seems to be her normal. There wasn't an alarming amount of fluid in there and according to their growth chart she is following her own little growth curve. There's nothing to be alarmed about here!
In the midst of it all it was hard not to want to freak out about it, It isn't everyday you're told that your perfect-in-your-eyes 15 month of will need brain surgery. There was a over tone of this had to happen and this was our only option. As believers we know that isn't always the case. What we're told isn't always the only option. We serve God, the God who raised Jesus from the dead. And that same power lives in us. Through prayers and the prayers of others God bent His ear and saved Lily from such a radical procedure. Though it's a common procedure- we're told, it still wasn't yet in our vocabulary until this entire thing began to unfold. So, I am going to sit here and praise the God almighty, the God of the universe- who created all things, including Lily. He knows her best. He knit her together in my womb.
I've been reminded of God's grace and mercy once more. I've been reminded that just because we're told this is IT, it isn't it. No trouble is too big or too small for God. Thank you Lord Jesus- He who saves. He saved us from sorrow upon sorrow and He saved Lily from yet another rough ride. Lily continues to be a medical mystery to the medical industry and I know God will come through and continue to push Lily through. I know she will continue to baffle and mystify doctor's because she's amazing and God has His hand on her.
If you pray for Lily, please continue to do so both for her and for us- we need it and appreciate it immensely. God hears us, Lily is proof. The fact that my husband and I are still pressing forth unto the goal- is also proof.
God bless you all.
